Pimping the Ownz

Tonight was Role-Play night over at Ryan and Cassie's. Trev came by the apartment and picked me up, and we were on our way. We've started a new game of BESM based upon the anime series Blue Gender. So far, it seems to be going quite well. Our combat unit seems to be kicking blue ass, so that is good.

We had the Philosopher's Bible Study today, which was quite nifty. It was sort of odd, as the main people involved are almost the last people one would expect to be studying the Bible (myself included). It's interesting because while we are for the most part fearless regarding philosophical issues, issues of the Bible are somewhat out of our comfort zone. At any rate, that makes it that much more interesting.

Other news: This site is truly great. Superman really is a dick, even when he's sober, as these images prove. They aren't fake!

Friday Morning, and All Is Well!

So, I had an interesting conversation with Bower yesterday. As you may or may not know, I have been formulating an concept of history as a 4-dimensional equation relating the interactions of space-time vectors. Throughout the matter, the chief difficulty for me has been the problem of human consciousness. How does it fit in, and does it really have an effect on things? As I thought more about it, Leibniz's notion of pre-ordained harmony seemed to fit quite nicely, though it is disturbingly deterministic. Needless to say, I am somewhat uneasy. At any rate, I was talking with Bower, and I mentioned that I think I have been turning into Leibniz (intellectually). He just looked at me and said, "Quite frankly, I'm not surprised. I saw it coming a looong time ago." Confused, I asked how long. "Logan and I actually predicted it about two years ago, mentioning that you were probably Leibniz reincarnated." Which is somewhat interesting, considering that Gottfried Wilhelm von Leibniz died on November 14, which just so happens to be my birthday. This just weirded me out a bit. Does this mean that I will be fated to "reverse engineer" some new mathematical system by looking at the works of the reincarnation of Sir Isaac Newton, and then commence to get into a huge feud with said reincarnation? If so, is that reincarnation by any chance John Lesh? Does that mean that I am forever tied to John Lesh, my chief nemesis, and the antithesis of all that is pure and good and holy? Oh crap, my life would suck! Good thing I don't believe in reincarnation, then.

In other news, we start Philosopher's Bible Study, with Wyma, Cochise, Lil' Jao, some guy I don't really know, and me. It should be interesting. I'm looking forward to it, at any rate.

In other other news, my sister's boyfriend is in town this weekend, which means she wants the car. In short, I will be confined to my feet once more. Damn the luck. Oh well. I went three years without a car, so what difference will two days make? Probably not much. I'll just have to bum rides off of people. At any rate, folks, live long and prosper.

Rage Diminished

So today I was feeling a bit more mellow. I think that was a good thing. I didn't bite anybody's head off in Ideas, and LS-250 was relatively normal. However, one amusing anecdote did occur: So I went over to this girl's house. She and I are in relational limbo right now. Probably will be for some time. At any rate, in an attempt to show affection, I decided to get her a book. After all, flowers wilt, but books can last centuries. I ended up getting her Umberto Eco's Name of the Rose. A good book, to say the least. I showed up at her door with the book behind my back, and rung the doorbell. After being let in, I immediately turned to her and said, "I have to ask you a question." Immediately, a look of fear came over her face. I had alluded to a surprise in earlier conversation, and she was worried that it would be some major commitment type thing. However, she replied "sure." "Will you..." pause for effect "...read this book and tell me what you think." Priceless, I say. It was a perfect let-down. Let's just say that I play the role of the trickster quite well.

Feeling Combative

Yesterday was slightly odd for me. For some unknown reason, I was feeling incredibly confrontational. It started Monday night, as I was reading for Ideas about History. The thing was that the guy writing one of the books had completely misunderstood Nietzsche's concept of eternal recurrance, and then basically used his misunderstanding to argue against it. Those of you who know me know that you do not fuck with the Nietzsche around me. He may be considered the anti-christ, but he's also my intellectual bread and butter. Needless to say, it put me in a foul mood the next morning in class as we discussed the issue. I think some of the people in the class were a little shocked that I would defend Nietzsche's position. The truth is that, while I don't believe that he is entirely right, his position is internally consistent and logical. To try and argue that it isn't is fallacy of the highest order. Then, the author tried to argue that Nietzsche's view of history should be rejected because it renders human actions absurd and meaningless. It's a fallacy of the highest order, that's what the argument is! All the guy is doing is saying that he doesn't like the results. The truth is, the universe doesn't care whether you like the way things are. Hell, even God doesn't really care if you like the way things are. It's all just a brute fact of life that you have to live with. I hate to sound insensitive (okay, maybe not), but the truth is that feelings really don't count for shit in the world of philosophy. If you don't like something, too bad. Grow up and deal with it. There are reasons to object to a position that are better than "It makes me feel bad."

Meanwhile, LS-250 saw us getting our groups for the final project. I don't know how it's going to turn out, to be perfectly honest. I don't really know any of the people in my group, and I feel like something of a wild card as to how it could all turn out. It could go really well or really horrid. I have a feeling I will be one of the voices of dissent within the group.

In other news, Harry G. Frankfurt (of Frankfurt Example fame) was in the New York Times on Monday. Apparently, he has recently published an article that he wrote a while back entitled On Bullshit. The article intrigued me, so I went and showed it to Keith. He had actually looked over Frankfurt's essay back when it was floating around academia. I thought that was really cool. I'll have to find the essay and buy it sometime. It may take a while, though, considering that academic books don't usually show up in most bookstores. At any rate, Keith and I had a good conversation about all manner of things from Lord of the Rings to the Simpsons to the future of the department. It turns out that we have officially hired Rebekah Rice as our new philosophy prof, so Keith's current run in Modern is sort of a farewell tour for that class. Rebekah is a cool individual, and seems like a really good fit for our school. Too bad I won't be able to take any courses from her. Damned graduation. Oh well.

Another Saturday Night and I ain't Got Nobody

Yep. Saturday is always a kind of boring day for me. Yesterday, I decided to go and loiter at the mall. So I did. I went into Barnes & Noble, and picked out a bunch of comic books, found a table, and commenced reading them. As I was doing so, this girl with whom I am acquainted (distantly, mind you) comes up to me and says "Will, are you waiting for someone, or using this other chair?" I look up from my comic book, and think "I'm a grown man sitting alone reading comic books. Does it look like I'm waiting for someone?" But instead, I say the lame, "Nah, go ahead and take it." I could have said something witty, but I didn't. And I hated myself for it. Oh well. In the evening, I went and saw one of the theater senior projects. It was about learning disabilities, a subject with which I am intimately familiar, being one who suffers from them myself. I know parts of it were meant to be funny, but I couldn't really bring myself to laugh. Maybe it was my own pain that blocked me. It's a pain that I have held onto for some time, as it is what drove me all throughout my schooling. Many people look at me and think that I've always been the way I am. The truth is, my academic achievement has always been driven by this weird inferiority complex. When I was in elementary school in Oregon, I was told that I would never be able to write because of my learning disabilities. I was in the lower reading levels at the time. When we moved to Seattle after 2nd grade, I had no friends, and nothing else to do, so I started reading seriously. Suddenly, books were all that I had to keep me company. Over that summer, I jumped reading levels, to the point where instead of being a grade level behind the class, I was three grade levels ahead. It took the new school time to realize this, as I was reading more, and faster, than anybody else in the class, had a bigger vocabulary than most of the other students, and spent my spare time reading the dictionary. Eventually, they put me in the more advanced reading section, which fit me better. But the fact is, my pain is what drove me. I don't think I can let go of that, otherwise I am liable to fail. My pain has become my armor, my raison d'etre. At any rate, I thought it was a good performance. Afterwards, feeling very alone, I decided to go to my friend Claire's surprise 21 & 1/2 birthday party over at Dave Thorpe's place. So I did. I saw some people, had a few laughs, and then went home, feeling just as alone as ever. Ugh. And now, here I sit, Sunday morning, writing, and contemplating today's round of the Atheist's Bible Study.